Meme - Fifteen books you've read that will always stick with you.

Fifteen Books that you've read that will always stick with you - GO!
Rules: Don't take too long to think about it. Fifteen books you've read that will always stick with you. First fifteen you can recall in no more than 15 minutes.

1. Dangerous Angels -- Francesca Lia Block
2. 100 Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
3. Hamlet - Shakespeare
4. The Bridge - Ian M. Banks
5. Consider Phlebas - Ian M. Banks
6. Transmetropolitan - Warren Ellis
7. Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail '76 - Hunter S. Thompson
8. Lolita - Nabokov
9. 1001 Nights (The originals; took a class that compared different translations)
10. Bluebeard - Charles Perrault
11. The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
12. La Vagabonde - Collette
13. Goodbye, Paper Doll - Anne Snyder
14. Good Omens - Niel Gaiman, Terry Pratchet
15. Mythago Wood - Robert Holdstock
16. The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood

Cheer Camp, Day 1

Wow!!!

Ok, so I am a sucker, and I am totally participating in Cheer Camp. The dances just look SO FUN; I can't help myself!!! I'm going to run out of clean work-out clothes. :p

I am totally grateful that I have been teaching 20 hrs/wk (and hence, working out 4-6hrs a day) for the past four weeks, because OMG: dance camp is HARD. Today I didn't do the warm up, nor Routine A, nor the technique class. However, I did do Routine B and C; both AWESOME girly jazz/hip hop/street jazz; the stuff I love and used to take from Alison but these were taught by Lizzy Richardson (she reminds me very much of Alison in a wonderful way). I also took FAST Hip Hop with Brandy (can't find video for ya... I'll keep looking), and learned the Camp Dance. So that was my four hours of BUSTIN' for today.
Tomorrow, more of the same, but also the warm up (at 8:30 ... I'd better get to sleep!) and some administrator classes.... I'd kinda like to take the technique classes, too: triple pirouettes into hitch kicks = NOM!!!


I watch my tough girls getting into the Spirit, and I wonder what would I have been like, if I had done this when I was young? (Well, I'd be a much better dancer, wah.) I'm pleased that I can at least take class with these college stars; but I'm getting my ass handed to me, frequently. This choroegraphy is amazing, and they teach SO FAST!! There are Britney Spears' choroegraphers and ... well; I digress too much for 1am.

I am really engaged by how this whole process is about team-building.
It reminds me of the really great weekend jesus camp I went to, which was all about feeling good and singing alternative-rock-styled songs about Jesus for hours on end. They'd use an overhead projector for the lyrics, so everyone could sing along. The first night was what I remember most: over two hours of singing (translates to chanting, if you have yogic experience) in a large group, that got everyone high on physical experience, physical expression, positivity and a unity of openness and security in single-mindedness.

I totally got teary-eyed a few times today; watching amazing performers teach and go all-out; watching groups, watching teams cheer for their team-mates and for the staff here -- just because that's the culture. (YAY! You got up and danced the twist with twenty other people, just to represent our team!!! Let's scream your name and cheer you on!!) The culture insists that you support each other, and you help one another to learn and grow. No BS. You're a team. And for those of us who have not had that kind of community in our upbringing, it's amazing.

I'm really glad to be experiencing it. I am enjoying my perspective, as the cheer-virgin that I am, and watching how my cheerleading team is observing 500 people's camaraderie and having (for the first time, for some?) a deep desire for that unity. I think that many of us have not ever experienced this kind of cultural/familial/communal acceptance and purpose, where one can feel safe enough to admit and commit to really throwing our hearts out there and being a *team*.

So many of us only feel free to take that risk of vulnerability when we're infatuated, but these young adults are leaders, creating their own family. It's really touching.
YAY CHEER CAMP!

You know you're working too hard when....

I woke up hungry. Not just peckish, like normal, but STARVING. Mind you; I ate dinner last night at 11pm-midnight; and it was loads of salad with dressing and avocado and cashews and penne with marinara and near a quarter pound of hamburger, and Guittard Chocolate chips and two glasses of red wine. And I woke up at 9am STARVING. As I rushed off to work, I stopped at Peet's and got a large latte with two raw sugars (NOM), and a lemon-currant mini scone, and scarfed that down on my way in to teach yoga.
I started everyone sitting on the floor, and breathed deeply, and then had us all lean forward, letting our backs stretch out, and then to each side... and the room was SPINNING, like a sloshy boat. I drank more latte and slowed myself up to speed and was okay after I covered up that the room was tilting around me for five minutes.

I came home after the following hour of teaching Pilates & ate all the meaty pasta leftovers, covered in a big pile of mozzarella. I'm so glad the cheerleaders canceled on me, so that I can take a nap instead of practicing leaps and turns with them for an hour.

I leave at 6:30 to teach at least 2 hours of dance.....
(And this after Monday was a holiday.)

Birthday Pictures!

(Thank you, Steev!) Birthday Pictures, Album #1




Birthday Pictures, Album #2

We're on America's Got Talent!

It is weird that they showed Sharon Xing us -- she was the one who *didn't* X us. I'm just thankful that they didn't decide to linger on humiliating us (like they did with the folks who fell off the stage).

They cut all the dancing, for the sake of close-ups, but really; I'm counting our blessings. We performed in front of 2000 high school teens (listen to them FREAKING OUT; ha ha ha! I guess we are still scary!), on (inter?)national television, and everyone looked Great!!

2010-06-18 Hubba Hubba Revue - Hell0046

2010-06-18 Hubba Hubba Revue - Hell0046
Originally uploaded by Vulcania

Teh Cuteness!!!

"Reality" TV & Presidential Speeches - a National Addiction?

Yesterday, I posted the following rant in response to a post about Obama’s firey BP speech. Responses were either, “FINALLY, Obama gets tough!” or disillusioned cries of “bullshit” from those convinced Obama’s evil, since things aren’t going spectacularly. The owner of the original comment wisely calmed the fires before any flame-wars broke out on his facebook (SMART THINKING, @Michelangelo!), but I’m kinda curious to see if anyone agrees with me.

I am suspicious that the nation has become addicted to media bursts. It seems like every time Obama makes a speech, folks get in a huff about it being a sign that either A. He’s finally doing his job, or B. This just proves he’s a liar, and he’s doing exactly the opposite of his job.
It seems to me that people interpret Presidential PSA’s as the signal that actual work is being done, rather than…. you know; the possibility that work involves sitting quietly at your presidential desk, and not making reality TV for everyone to get fired-up about.
Here was my comment:

“To start - this sucks; BP blows, the government has been overrun by OIL for ever. (Why can't we run our cars on corn ethanol?)
However... I can't help feeling that everyone's gotten addicted to the Republican's over-dramatized Presidential Pep Talks.
Just because Obama's not on TV saying "We'll get those BP Guys!!" every day like GWB was with Bin ... See MoreLaden, there seems to be an assumption that he's picking his nose instead of... ida know; learning how drilling works, organizing a website to accept solution suggestions, rounding up volunteers from across the country, hiring scientists to imagine future damage & solutions, talking with the industry in local meetings or on the phone, learning about the problem from people on the ground, rather than the white-collars who are paid to say "everything is going to be okay; you don't know anything, so just truuuuust us," .... stuff that happens in your office. Doing a press conference is, frankly, less worth our time than him doing his research. He's a lawyer; he will research; that's how you win lawsuits that force companies to be culpable.

“Ida know, guys; what *exactly* could've happened faster? I can't help but relate this to watching your sick animal at the vet; they can only do a biopsy before they give the drugs that may work or may just ruin the biopsy, they can only do the surgery if the drugs fail... stuff like that that gives everyone a sense of helplessness, but just goes to show that there is still a long way to go in technology.
It's not likely, they can physically do more to the well than they are at a time, right? Plug it and drill a hole in the side to maybe bypass it -- but perhaps side-drilling will weaken the chances that the plug will work (didn't anyway, but...)
And it's not like we can sue them for damages before we know how bad it's going to be. And it's not like Obama's able to supervise each cleanup employee, and know who's working hard enough and who's understaffed... all of this stuff just takes time, and I don't think the government was necessarily supposed to be able to physically handle this task faster/better than BP.

“Yes, it FUCKING SUCKS. But I don't think I can get behind the assumption that Obama's been slacking, just because he hasn't been giving these war-speeches on TV all the time.”

Kids these days!

If there is one thing that makes you remember being a teenager, it’s having your parent tell you that you don’t understand something that you actually do understand. It’s a quintessential barrier between ages; it’s nearly possible to accept that a younger person’s different ideas or qualitative values could be true.

Of course, that's because kids are often full of shit.
But when your happy, glowing, successful, loved, newly married daughter, who finished grad school and is pursuing her intended career tells you that her spirituality is sufficient… well… apparently that’s hard to believe, when she doesn't know God.

It’s frustrating that my mom should get so stumped here.
I’m able to translate her universal truths into my spiritual dialect. Individually, she always smiles and is pleased to hear me eloquently explain the experience of letting go of defensiveness, of forgiveness, of openness, love and gratitude. But she remains convinced that, since I don’t believe in God per say, my spiritual life is not as full as it could be.

She denied that my path could be equal in “fullness” because she assumes that I underestimate her path. This is likely because when I said, “her path,” she imagined whatever my twenty-year-old self said to her in order to fight off her evangelism. But that was ten years ago, and my life and spiritual self have radically matured.

Hearing her tell me that I don’t understand immediately brought back the defensiveness, the sting and the insult of the memory of adolescent frustration. (Most notably because I had the now-rare impetus to go outside and chain-smoke.) Her idea of my spirituality is based on my rebellious, young-adult self. When she insists that I am too inexperienced to understand, she’s basing her analysis on her own inexperience of who I am now.

Geez, parents just don’t understand!!
(hah hah…)

"The Metaphysics of Authenticity"

I have this Angela Carter book in the bathroom, and I only ever get to read a paragraph or two at a time. It's just as well, because Angela Carter's witty columns often take days of delight-filled mastication. Sometimes I wonder - 'did I really just read that?' or, 'when was this written; yesterday or thirty years ago?' or, 'OMG thank god someone has explained that nagging feeling I've been having!' This last one happens frequently, as Carter has an extraordinary talent for recognizing fads, hypocrisy of class, and falseness. I love it. Don't get me wrong; I love living in the Bay Area, and I'm supportive of openness and love paying my taxes (really!), but my god; sometimes I just want to call bullshit!
Angela Carter must be the queen of bullshit-calling, and she did it long in advance of most trends' popularity (see the NYTimes review at the bottom). I love that she identifies falseness without making the argument that her own ideas are true based on the false rationale of her subject matter. Carter just says, "fuck, people, get over yourselves."

At the moment, I'm reading through a series of articles that she wrote about culinary books, before "foodies" even existed; before Julia. I love foodie magazines, but I love it even more when I can have a chuckle with Carter about how ridiculous some of these idealizations are. She pries the dramatics (a.k.a. snobbery) off of these books and points at wider trends, without disrespecting their sensuality or the prose.

Enjoy:

"This combination of material asceticism and passionate enthusiasm of the sensuality of the everyday is at the core of the tradition from which Mrs Gray springs, with its obvious affinities to the style of Bloomsbury, where it was a moral imperative that the beautiful should always take precedence over the comfortable. Though 'beautiful' is not quite the right word -- it is a kind of authenticity which is invoked here, as though water is more authentic, more real, wetter, draw from a open-air cistern than from a city tap.

"The metaphysics of authenticity are a dangerous area. When Mrs Gray opines, 'Poverty rather than wealth gives the good things of life their true significance', it is tempting to suggest it is other people's poverty, always a source of the picturesque, that does that. Even if mrs Gray and her companion live in exactly the same circumstances as their neighbours in the Greek islands or southern Italy, and have just as little ready money, their relation to their circumstances is the result of the greatest of all luxuries, aesthetic choice. 'Poverty', here, is sloppy language -- a rare example of it. Mrs gray isn't talking about a pavement dweller in Calcutta, or a member of the long-term unemployed in an advanced, industrialized country; nor about poverty as such, but about a way of life which has a dignity imposed upon it by its stoicism in the face of a nature on which it is entirely dependent. The Japanese created an entire aesthetic, and a moral philosophy, out of this stoicism and this intimate relation with natural forces; as soon as they had a bob or two in their pockets, of course, they binged on consumerism, but the hard core is still there."

~Angela Carter's Book Review, "Patience Gray: Honey from a Weed," from the book Shaking a Leg.
Carter, Angela. Shaking a Leg: Collected Journalism and Writings. New York: Penguin Group, 1998. 102. Print.

This isn't the only article where she talks about the upper class idealizing the diets of working class people in foreign countries. And it's not just about learning to cook; she talks about the cult of the whole-grain bread folks, the vegetarians and vegans who have made their food preferences nearly evangelical cult activities. Not that there is anything crappy about eating no meat or baking your own bread. But Carter has a way of walking in and calling a duck a duck, and a cult a cult.
It's refreshing.


From a NYTimes Review on Shaking a Leg:
"But to adopt Angela's own kind of terminology for a moment, what emerges most powerfully from Shaking A Leg is her ability to detect bullshit at two hundred paces. Years before the term `foodie' had been invented, she was mocking the pretensions of the cookery writer who insists on recherche ingredients not because of their qualities but their snob value. And it is a delight to find her, years before the porn star Linda Lovelace came out as a victim of the sex industry, deconstructing the actress's sexual braggadocio as a species of false consciousness -- and discerning a profound rage behind Lovelace's notorious skill at fellatio. The permissive societies of which Lovelace is a product, Carter points out more than once, are actually deeply repressed: why else do people need permission to explore their sexuality? Only someone with an appreciation of the sweaty, earthy pleasures of sex could create this kind of critique, outspoken and completely unprudish..."

25 Year Service Awards

This afternoon, I attended the district reception for the sixteen people who have served for 25 years at the San Mateo Community College District. It was a fun party, especially since the bar was open; I totally work with the fun (a.k.a."bad") crowd, Yay!

There were some amazing careers that we learned about. The first woman recognized had been working for the district since students used punch-cards to enroll in classes, and floppy disks were considered a lot of storage. She's now the head of all the IT in the district; from the online enrollment & grading systems to our google email; everything. Apparently she's got grown kids and she and her husband are active in a Corvette club (and have two). She was fashionable & attractive, and she is a woman; the woman who brought thousands of people in this district from punch-cards to live lecture web-casts.
I know plenty of women my age in the technology/IT/games/3D animation field. I know very, very few who are hardware & sys-admin oriented, and even fewer who have been doing that work since 1985. That woman is an amazing role model.

Another honoree had written the grant that started the funding for Middle College, a program that allows high school students get to attend community college classes in order to graduate more quickly & start building up their college credits. We didn't have such a thing when I was 15 in California, but I heard about it in Washington (where it was called "Running Start,") and adopted it for myself. It's an amazing program that saves capable kids from giving up on their education when they're being stifled by the stupidity/drama/status quo/etc. of adolescent academia.

Another woman who was honored had opened the first college computer writing center in the country; and had to fight hard to do it. She was a revered professor; had taught every English class offered, had her PhD, also worked at Stanford (and in my mind, this explains the next part, I hope, I hope, I hope...), was retiring this year... and was ADJUNCT FACULTY. WTF. As in: after 25 years, she never got a full time job.

Who would've guessed that my chances at getting a full time job might be *better* teaching dance than English?
OMG PLEASE don't let that be my fate... Go State Budget, GO!!!

I was super grateful to have gotten to see so many amazing women recognized by our district. And how often do you get to go to a work function and have a great time like that?

I love my job.

Friendships - Rekindling and Dousing

I had dinner tonight with a lovely friend whom I haven't spent time with in quite some time. Most recently, it was because I'd accidentally been using her old email address to invite her to things. But, as usual, life was also muddying up our social lives as well. She was surpsised to hear that I also had been making myself more scarce in the social scene we used to frequent. I expected as much from her, because she's doing Big Amazing Things. (I'm so proud of her awesome hard work; you go girl!!!)

Anyhow, we did a lot of catching up, which ended up covering a lot of stories about growing apart from people and friendships. There were many reasons discussed, and different circumstances, but for me, I just kept re-locating on one unanswered question.

When do you hold it against someone that they're not being a great friend?

It's a tricky question; sort of like trying to decide how much lateness or flakiness you'll overlook for the sake of a friendship. The same sort of rationalizing and anxious guilty feelings apply here.

For example; I know I'm not perfect. I wonder whether I've been slacking on my reaching-out, whether I've been doing enough responding to internet blasts, whether I've been being a good friend. But then I think about my awesome best friends who live across the country, and how much more I hear from them than from some of the folks I used to feel close to when I was in SF more. So... that's the beginning of the reflection on growing apart being more disappointing than neutral.

One thing that rekindles friendly intimacy after a gap in closeness is experiencing surprise at time having passed and joy at reconnecting. The experience of realizing you've lost touch being simultaneously surprising and inspiring tends to make good friends stay in more frequent contact. Contrariwise, when that ritual doesn't occur, it's disappointing.

Staying in touch takes effort, for sure.
But, call me spoiled.... I think a good friend makes that effort. And I'm realizing that I'm becoming more interested in focusing my social energy on fewer but closer friendships. We've all seen our friends' time be monopolized by different events in their life; marriage, other friends, hobbies, obsessions. But the kind of friendships I want to emotionally invest in are those in which my investment is recognized and matched.

Looking Away

My dance teacher, Christopher Dolder, when I was at UC Berkeley, was an amazing dancer, teacher and mentor. He stood up for me in all of my youthful freakiness, backed up my artistic integrity, and kicked my ass 7.5hrs/wk (minimum).

Here's one of the most amazing things he taught me:

I was struggling with the concept of my mother's choice to be reborn in Christ. Not because of Jesus; that part I understood. I understand my mother's desire to be loved unconditionally, and to be led by something higher than ourselves. And I understood why she wanted to be part of a religious community. What I didn't understand was why she was giving up so many things; meat, movies, music, jewelry, books.

At the time (I was 20), I could only see this abstention as boxing oneself in; hiding from reality. And the things I was most proud of my mother for, in an avatar/hero/mythological way, were her accomplishments of bravery.
For example; my mother went to El Salvador in the late 60's/early 70's, where the government soldiers pointed machine guns at her, and some authoritarian tried to keep her from leaving the country with her new husband and an abscessed tooth. She was there with the Peace Corps, educating women about birth control in a time when IUDs were still piercing through women's uteruses, and that was deemed worth the risk, often.
My mother worked in the first Free Clinic in the Haight, holding young women's hands as they went through abortions, back then.
As a child, I saw my mother could walk into a household where the families were screaming and hitting, and she could calm everyone down and get them to speak to one another and make up.
As a school psychologist, my mother took four times as many cases per year than any of her colleagues. In the 1990's, she constantly went on home visits to field workers' families with dirt floors, and worked her calming magic - in a second language, no less. She took me with her to see happy families of different classes (not that we had much money, but it was tons in comparison), and made sure that I understood that beauty and kindness were to be found in places unfamiliar to my own white upbringing.

So, why then, I asked my mentor, would my mother be shutting her eyes to reality now??

Christopher then told me something that I pondered for weeks, at first as totally foreign, and then as amazingly intimately honest about true human experience. Being a self-proclaimed "hard-ass woman," at first, I thought, "that's silly! don't be such a baby!" But now I see the glory of it's subtle wisdom.

Christopher told me that, sometimes, after seeing enough pain and suffering, people just don't want to see it anymore, and they decide to protect themselves from being upset by the harsher things in life.

And, you know what? That is okay.

Afraid to Post

I just pondered, deeply, the idea of starting a new blog.
Maybe part of me thinks that "Curly Ripe Meat" is no longer a very interesting blog title.
Maybe CRM should be my blog for adventures, real life, pictures, etc., and not my editorials.

Maybe I'm still a bit bruised from the backlash I got about a Starbucks cup, and about my posts on maturity and the couple-dates I'd been longing for (and now am loving!)...
And being bruised is okay, and careful about people's feelings.

But...
of all of the wind that blows through your hair when you're young (and turns out to be farts), of all the passion of unfettered horses running wild (that you can't keep up with)... speaking my mind is one of the things I loved most about my youthful self. There has always been a power and a freedom in being willing to sense, analyze and express my opinions in life.

A power that scares others. A power that intimidates. And I've spent a lot of time in the last few years learning how not to intimidate others unintentionally. I'm glad of that. I'm glad of being softer and more approachable, and of how that makes me more able to give.

But, sometimes I miss the freedom, and considering chopping my journal in two after seven years seems rather constricting to me.
So, it makes me think that, perhaps, one of the ways that I don't want to get old is by letting people crush my inquisitive writing.

Now; understand me -- I don't mean that I should be cruel or rude to people; I've always had too much of a desire to be elegant to be insulting out of ignorance or carelessness. However; speaking abstractly in my own blog, which no-one has to read... well... I believe that I should feel comfortable here. And I miss trusting my instinct to not be a total ASS by accident.

Writing this reminds me of now old disagreements about whether it's okay to blog in a way that might cause others offense. I hold that it isn't honorable or kind to be hurtful to someone directly; some respond that one should be free to journal about whatever they want. I put stock in the validity and benefits of abstract thought and debate, but this, too, can backfire if the reader's application of the abstraction reflects negatively.

But, honestly.... I don't need to feel responsible for everyone's reactions to my opinions. Maybe we disagree! Maybe I sound shallow to you, petty. Maybe it hurts that I'm in a different place than you are, and view my experiences in a different way than you view similar experiences of your own. And that's okay!

That I am going to venture out of my fear and feel free to opine.

Our Wedding Video Trailer!

Our awesome friends have posted our trailer on their Ambient Sky Blog! I am soooo grateful for their amazing video!!!
http://ambientsky.blogspot.com/2010/04/amber-steevs-wedding-trailer-from-santa.html

Amber and Steev were married on a cliff overlooking the beach in Santa Cruz, California. The reception was just across the road at the Davenport Roadhouse where they created a wedding experience unlike any we've ever filmed. From jugglers, to contortionists, to face painting, to a delicious custom designed Barnum Circus Animal Cookie cake... Every detail was specific in meaning and emotion to ensure this day was a reflection of their love for each other and their unique and creative personalities.

Full disclosure... I've known Steev for about 25 years... He's been one of my closest friends and the most influential force on my creativity throughout my life. From my first guitar lessons to recording engineering to inspiring me to be a filmmaker. He's been the ignition that started the fires of obsession for my creative endeavors.

One of my proudest moments was when he asked us to film their wedding. One of my happiest moments was being there as he married the woman he waited so long to meet.

Please enjoy this brief glimpse into their incredible wedding day.

S.


For my friend and his amazing wife.



Please allow the movie time to load.

Last week of the 20's - Dirty Thirties, here I come!

Here it is, the last week of my twenties. The thirties are gonna rock.

I always have been "ahead of my time" to some degree, so... I kinda feel over the twenties anyhow, by at least a year or two.

What with all of the privacy issues this year on social networking sights, I have been often reminded that my actual age will be broadcast (and to some of my students) every time I post about it. I'm trying to be actively proud and open, because I think that age-hiding is silly. (Of course, I am not suffering from age discrimination at the moment, so I have the freedom to say that with collegiate impunity.) I want to help set the tend that women are awesome and amazing as they age, and to give young women something to look forward to. I have known so many awesome older women (and some FREAKING HOT, SEXY 50 year olds, lemmie tell you!), and I'd like to set an awesome example myself.

Pina Bausch Walzer

This is stunning. I love the young woman who is madly making the men support her thrill-ride and recklessness, and the equally hysterical young woman who is afraid to do anything but scream dramatic bloody murder. And I love the way Pina makes such fun of show-offy femininity without losing any of the love for it's charm. I love the way that the little frippery of feminine movement becomes translated into dance movement. RIP Pina Bausch; you were a genius.

Sports Management Questionnaire

One of my students asked to interview me on my career in Sports Management. I thought it was pretty interesting to hear myself answer these questions, mostly because I'm chuckling & thinking to myself "aww... I sound all grown up!" Heee hee!

Please introduce yourself and how many years have you been a director and choreographer?

My name is Amber Steele, and I have been a director and choreographer since 2000.


What area of specialty did you study in college that lead to a career in sports management?
I received my BA from the Theater, Dance and Performance Studies Department, with an emphasis in Dance from UC Berkeley. I received my Masters of Fine Art from Mills College in Dance, emphasis Choreography.
I also began my own dance company in 2005, which has given me invaluable experience with managing employees, booking, taxes, billing, etc. I wish that they taught that in the schools I went to, but they did not. I have been teaching since 2002, beginning with individual private lessons, then teaching classes at dance studios and also teaching my dance company's master classes.


How involved are you with your athletes?
Very, especially the younger ones. Mentoring athletes often involves getting to know their health and mental issues so that you can work collaboratively on making a productive team in the midst of whatever their personal life may throw at them. It's also important to maintain a bit of emotional distance as the manager. I have to be able to direct the room, stop personal moments from interrupting rehearsal time, and to be able to have some sort of disciplinary recourse when the athlete is not able to fulfill his or her obligations to the team.


What are the positives and negatives of your job?
Positives: I love teaching students and seeing the joy on their faces when they achieve something they didn't realize they could do. I get to dance every day! I get to work on big projects with relatively short (one semester) deadlines, which means I get to see them through from start to finish. I have a fairly open schedule.

Negatives: It takes decades to get job security. I have lots of time when I am not at work... but doing work (email, class prep, scheduling) that I am not getting paid for. In terms of my company, I almost never make more than a couple hundred dollars in profit, yet I spend most of the year in the red, paying for rehearsal space, costumes and makeup. (They only pay you after the gig.) Even when I do get paying gigs, they almost never pay enough money to compensate for time; just expenses.


What percentage of your clients pay are you entitled to or is that confidential information?
For my dance company, I rarely make a profit/compensation for my time, so I usually just pay the bills. My dancers don't get compensated unless we are going out of town for a paid gig, and in that case I bid for them to get a set amount, plus travel, room & board, and I charge extra for administration & booking fees. I would collect all additional profits, as it is my company & my choreography. When a different member of the troupe was managing, she took 10% of the total bid as her fee.

If you are teaching dance at a studio, you usually have to get a certain number of people through the door, for which you collect 30-40% of their class payment, and then, if your class is in high demand, you begin to make a higher percentage.
Some places will simply rent you the space, and allow you to take the money directly.


Do you have a large staff that works with you as a management team, and if yes, how do you accomplish your task through them?
Normally, I do the work myself. When we were planning more travel (and I was in grad school), I hired one of my company members to take on the job of booking our tour. For this, I gave her 10% of the bid, and paid her separately as a dancer. When a smaller gig comes through, I often have certain jobs delegated. For example, one member of the team is the Rehearsal Manager. It is her job to gather everyone's schedules and to pick rehearsal times, keep track of absences, and to keep everyone informed. Another job is Prop Manager; this person makes sure that we have all the equipment, props, makeup, etc. that we need for each performance. The Stage Manager keeps track of our interactions with the venue on the day of the event; including making sure we have water, space to change, a locked room for our belongings, correct lighting and sound. On the side of General Management, I collect all payments, keep the books, file the taxes, reimburse for uniforms (when there is profit), reserve and pay for rehearsal space, create promotional materials, etc.


How secure is the job? What happens when an athlete wants to change managers, gets cut from a team or retires?
It is not secure at all. There is plenty of work for me to make for myself, but there is no constant influx of payment.
As with most creative/athletic endeavors, the only way to have a consistent paycheck is via teaching, and even that is not very consistent when the state government is in financial upheaval.

For my dancers, they are all free to come and go as they please, since I am not able to pay them most of the time. For each event, I poll the pool of dancers to find out who has the time to be able to rehearse and perform. Most of my dancers also perform with other groups and have other full-time jobs or educational endeavors.

Can you recommend this career to up and coming students who are studying hard to be sports management?
Managing a dance company is a side project that I do because I enjoy the process. I love teaching, I love rehearsing, and I love choreographing. I deeply enjoy organizing, managing, and seeing projects through from beginning to end.
If a person is studying sports management because they love the sport, that may lead them down the path of enjoying this work, but loving the sport alone is not enough -- taking part in the sport is only a small percentage of the job. A great sports manager must love communicating, negotiating and helping others to achieve their goals.
Conversely, an athlete who prefers to work on their skills alone, who prefers to be directed and challenged by someone else, or a person who is passive (or passive aggressive) in confrontational situations is probably not going to be a good sports manager. Despite being in a position of authority, good management frequently involves putting one's own ego aside and helping your athletes and team to surpass you. Good management is about facilitating team success.

Thanksgiving at Jesse's!

Steev, Me, my Mom, Jesse, Case (his godson), Layne & Peter (Case's Parents), Layne's Mom

BEST TURKEY EVER... okay; maybe the mythical one he made six years ago was as good, but this one had the most kick-ass stuffing EVER. Chestnuts & cherries & apricots and cranberries, oh my!
Plus, I'm proud because I made candied yams, roasted potatoes & brussels sprouts, and roasted green beans -- all at once, and got the timing right to prep, stick in oven, prep, add to oven, prep, stick in oven, pack salad makings, booze, etc. and DING! everything was ready! I didn't even singe anything, and it all tasted great! YAY I can be a grown up! Hee hee!
More pictures: http://www.holyzoo.com/000/images/holyzoo/2009/11-26-09_Thanksgiving1

ThanksChristmas!

Since we're going to be on our Honeymoon for Christmas, we're getting it all in early!

This last weekend was freaking awesome; we had Thanksgiving with Jesse & then ThanksChristmas with Steev's family on Friday. On Saturday, we watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer; both the movie & the beginning of the series, clocking in at least 4 hours on the couch with the cats. WIN!
Sunday, Claire & Sarah came over for gingerbread-house decorating (OMG Sarah is the coolest friend! Thank you for your mad baking skillz!) and they even helped us decorate the tree & house for Christmas!

Full Thanks-Christmas photos are here (thank you Manfriend!): http://www.holyzoo.com/000/images/holyzoo/2009/11-27-09_Thanksgiving2/

Pretty Walks!

Gary took us on his super-awesome hike up San Bruno Mountain. And when I say UP, I mean STRAIGHT UP. As in, we almost gave up 3/4 of the way up the hill! It was totally worth it to get to the top, though! Just in time for stunning sunsets & a bit of a rush down the hill, then delicious dinner with our fabulous friends. I love them!!!

More pictures here: http://www.holyzoo.com/000/images/holyzoo/2009/11-21-09_FeatherGaryHike